A 23-year-old woman is seeking advice after her 71-year-old boyfriend brought up the topic of marriage.
The woman took to Reddit to share that she has been with her “wonderful” 71-year-old boyfriend for two years and loves and cares for him very much.
“I am trying to think of what our future looks like together. He casually asked if I would be open to marriage, and because I don’t want kids or anything like that I knew it could work out,” she wrote. “I did have concerns about his life, generally though.”
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The woman added, “He is in generally good health, and he is very active. He can get more active time than me most of the time nowadays! His parents have lived to their 90s. In fact, his mom is still alive and he manages her care and properties on behalf of her.”
She continued, “His mom does have Alzheimer’s or dementia, and is very frail. This leads me to believe that there will be a point in his life where he will need extra care. His dad did not have memory issues, but did have a stroke. He doesn’t have any children, so I would be taking care of him as he gets older. What does it look like to care for an aging partner, especially if you have a job/career?”
The woman further said, “It’s a little strange planning for an end of a marriage, but I fully believe that a decade or two of happiness with him is better than not. I just want to make sure that I am the right one to take care of him and love him.”
Here’s what netizens said:
One user wrote, “You are signing up to be his nurse, not his wife. Don’t sabotage yourself like this! You deserve better. Don’t waste your young years being a servant. This is a horrible idea. This will damage you and set you back for the rest of your life, you must listen to the women who made the same mistake and are regretting it because of how the stress of being a 24/7 nurse and servant made them sick for the rest of their lives, to the point of needing but not affording someone to help them.”
Another added, “I adored my husband. If I had the time again knowing I was going to lose him and there was nothing I could do about it. I would still do it all again. Even if you were with someone your own age there would still be a likelihood of one of you acting for the other further down the line anyway so take your happiness if you love them then it won’t be a barrier. It certainly wasn’t for me.”